Head above Water…

One of the things that I love about having my own blog, is the ability to dictate my own schedule. I can write about what I want, when I want to. That said, I’ve made a commitment to you, the readers, that there will be certain constants. On a working day there will be (at least) two posts and you can expect they will be at the usual time. Friday = frocks and food. Some things just can’t be messed with… 😉

Just recently however, it sometimes seems like a real struggle keeping head above water. My treasured work life balance has been slipping on an epic scale and after starting off well, I’ve been faced with blogging from one day to the next – a situation I hate because it forces me to make decisions on what to schedule based on what’s available and least time consuming, rather than what offers the best content balance for the blog.

DIY Neon toe shoes via Green Wedding Shoes

I have no-one but myself to blame, having more time to myself has been great – I actually have way more free time than I used to, but in fact I’ve grabbed it so hard with both hands that I’m leaving myself with little time to blog and looming deadlines. I’m not the kind of person who says no to experiences so along with saying yes to everything I’m getting asked to do, I’m also planning trips away left right and centre. As I work on an iMac instead of laptop, that can leave me away from my desk and returning to an empty blog schedule to fill again.

Yellow bridal party via Bridal Musings

I’ve got a house that is in desperate need of tidying, I really need to get to the supermarket and get some healthy food in, my seeds need planting and I missed my BMF class again, something that is becoming a regular occurrence because my working hours are getting longer. That’s the main problem, my locum work is busy busy busy and while I can’t complain financially, there’s no point having money when there’s no time to spend it!

The perfect back garden via Fennel and Fern

I’m not complaining (honestly!) I know what I need to do to fix things, I just figured I’m probably not the only one out there who feels completely overwhelmed sometimes and drowning in to-do lists. Probably the most repeated phrase when people meet me or talk to me is, ‘I don’t know how you fit it all in,‘ and sometimes, I don’t. Luckily, this busy period has a finite ending point, which although further ahead than I’d like it to be, isn’t too far in to the distance. If it wasn’t, I’d be sat here thinking about what I needed to do to make things change, because I know what makes me happy and there’s no point complaining when you could do something about it. I need to look into buying a Macbook, so I can work on the move and I need to get home earlier, make that class, give Florence Finds some headspace.

Do you ever feel like everything is getting too much or is something stressing you out right now? It’s good to talk…


PS The images in this post are all taken from my Pinterest boards. Pinterest is a place that inspires me and these are all the things I’d like to be doing if I had a little more free time, getting my garden sorted, helping my best friend plan her wedding, getting my craft on… If you’d like to see my daily inspirations you can follow me on Pinterest.

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26 thoughts on “Head above Water…

  1. Firstly, I love those shoes!

    Secondly, I’m with you on the water/head/struggle thing, I’m constantly juggling my work, blog, wife, mum roles and if I think about what I have to do each day it terrifies me. Having said that, like you I’ve chosen this route and I wouldn’t have it any other way.. Maybe a couple of extra hours in the day wouldn’t go amiss!

  2. First off – that garden is beyond gorgeous. Serious flower envy here!

    Secondly – yes.


    I’ve long had the inability to stop when I’ve overloaded my proverbial plate and generally continue, unrelenting, until I completely burn out. I completely agree about wanting to grab every opportunity with both hands and I’m sure I’m not alone in thinking that if I don’t I could, well, be missing out something SIGNIFICANT. I’m also the kind of person who NEEDS to read three books at once, plan several things at the same time and clean the kitchen whilst catching up with a friend on the telephone, hanging out laundry and starting dinner.

    For me, I’ve been forced to stop. I’ve gone and been diagnosed with M.E. and whilst it’s truly frustrating to have to cease doing things in multitudes, it has been educational. Now I’m forced to balance one activity with a period of rest. I’ve had to learn to switch off completely. Gee whizz, it’s hard, frustrating, limiting and infuriating. On the other hand, when I look at the most healthy of my grandparents, it is my grandfather who has sworn by a post-lunch nap since adulthood who’s the most spritely of all: full-on active at 84. Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learned, eh?

    But…. my brain’s still trying to process things in plural. How do I make it stop?!

  3. This puts into words exactly how I have been feeling at the moment! Running a daily blog alongside a full time job is hard enough at the best of times but recently I have also been throwing bridesmaiding for three weddings, cooking and cleaning at my parents house during lambing time and the numerous social activities that spring up whenever the sun is shining (and, in fact, when it is not) into the mix, and it is so so hard to do everything.

    Like you, Rebecca, I hate saying no to things so instead I squeeze it all in and end up tiring / stressing myself out. But that said, I am still having fun and I keep telling myself that I won’t regret the things I haven’t done.

    That said, I do need to learn to slow down, but it is always reassuring that there are others in the same boat. Keep up the good work 🙂 xx

  4. As always Rebecca, I love your honesty! I think its what makes FlorenceFinds my fave place on the web.
    That aside, I’m also struggling at the minute, although my reason has been severe morning sickness coupled with the usual tiredness that early pregnancy brings. I’ve found myself neglecting my blog, my reading and cooking all in favour of sleeping! However, I seemed to have turned the corner earlier than my previous pregnancy and am hoping to get back on it from now on, the easiest thing I’ve found that I let slip is healthy food! So I am looking forward to getting my cooking mojo back on.
    And I have (stupidly) set myself the task of attempting my first cake baking experience for my daughters 1st birthday cake (in my head it is a 3 layer ombre effect sponge) so any AMAZING sponge recipes would be appreciated.

  5. YES!!!! I am way stressed! But I’ve got my fingers in my ears and my eyes scrunched closed and singing La La La at the top of my voice until it all goes away!

    I’m finding it very hard to cope with the fact that we’re moving out of our flat in three weeks as our buyers want to complete earlier than we thought, and we can’t move in to the place we’re buying until the end of june. So we are homeless for about four weeks, but we’re on holiday for two of them, which sounds good but how am i supposed to pack when all my holiday stuff is in storage? And when we come home, where will I wash two suitcases full of washing? and where will i put it when it’s dry? And then I have three big events in one weekend (two weddings and a big party that i’m supposed to be hosting), and how on earth can i get ready for them when i’m sleeping on someone’s floor? How do i get glitzy for a big family wedding when i’m doing my hair and make up at the gym? and if lesser importance: how will I commute to work? and, and, and….

    It’s all solveable and if i relax a bit and be less up-tight it’ll all work out fine (and to our advantage as we’ll save thousands!) but if i can’t plan things down to the finite details, i get upset and stressed and then i go in to shock and just shut down. Like when your hairdryer over heats or when MicroSoft just freezes…

    It’s going to be fine. I keep telling myself that… LA LA LA LA….

  6. Yes! Thank you for blogging about this, its good to know others are feeling the same. I’m in the middle of writing up my PhD thesis whilst working full time, and trying to renovate my house, and finish my professional qualifications, and sometimes I feel like I never stop from one week to the next.

    I definitely get a bit of a buzz out of going at 100mph all the time, and love my work, but the bit that gets me is the guilt. Feeling guilty that I don’t have enough time for my other half, that I’m constantly saying I can’t make it out to see friends, not speaking to my family often enough… I had to give up some voluntary work recently because it took up too much time, and i felt awful about it!! There was just no way of fitting it all in though.

    I’m completely in awe of those women who do it all whilst balancing a family too, and makes me feel like I’ve got nothing to complain about!

    My boyfriend is a star at making me stop and learn to say no a bit more . It goes against the grain to spend a Sunday afternoon on the sofa doing absolutely nothing, but being made to do it every once in a while does you the world of good!

  7. I think there’s an element of competitiveness among professional women in ther 20s/30s about who can fit the most in, have the busiest life, achieve the most, look the best… etc. I am guilty of it! I think it stems from the almost overwhelming opportunities we have, that perhaps our mothers didn’t have, and also the ‘fear of missing out’ (FOMO as my husband calls me!)
    We all push ourselves and while there’s nothing wrong with that to an extent, I don’t believe we should feel guilty about doing absolutely nothing every now and then. I’m off work this week with a to do list of cleaning, DIY, catching up as long as my arm, but currently sat in my pjs with the cat, reading blogs! I’m going to try not to feel guilty about it and instead see it as R&R, especially as Ive had a mad few weeks and a recurring cold. Sometimes navel gazing days give you the space to see clearly, recover and even have some creative ideas! That’s my excuse anyway…x

    • I agree completely Sarah. Every now and then I think we just need to pause and have a duvet day, works for me 🙂

    • FOMO is my biggest weakness, and I’m slightly ashamed of it! I need to have the courage to say “no”… I’m still learning (she says whilst trying to formulate excuses to not go and see Lady Gaga in Paris so i dont’ hurt my friend’s feelings, but to try and sort out tickets in the UK, and if I can’t then to not go at all)

      • I don’t think it’s FOMO that spurs me on, I just like being out and busy. Problem is it doesn’t allow me time to do the necessary (read: boring) things!

        Like Vicky says up there, a couple more hours would be great… anyone figured that one out yet?

  8. I am one person who likes it when you blog ahead far enough for me to read your posts 😉 but I think we’re all struggling to keep our heads above water from time to time… there’s an ebb and flow to things though. Having just gotten back to the office after a coffee with a friend where we both gabbled at each other for 20 minutes and slammed our coffees down when we looked at our watches and realised we needed to leave, makes me think it’s ok to say no sometimes.

  9. Yes!! It’s so hard! I am a blogger, wedding stylist and work full-time in a demanding job with long hours. Like you, people are always asking how I manage to fit it all, and the honest answer is I just can’t! I try and have a schedule for evenings when I am out networking or doing admin, and use the weekends to write blog posts. Of course, every once in a while something unexpected comes along, like a weekend away or family event and all this goes out the window and I’m working all hours of the night, squeezing meetings into lunchtimes, and even mentally writing blog posts while in the office. There is a lot of pressure on women to do ‘everything’, be successful, a great wife / mother / daughter, keep a beautiful home and prepare healthy meals every night. In the past six months I have been ill twice, taking more than a week off work, and letting down both my employer, readers and clients. Mostly though, I feel guilty that my husband is often the one that I end up missing out on time with and try and make sure we spend at least Sunday together enjoying a lazy brunch and time to relax and spend time together. I don’t think there’s a magic solution, but that perfect life/work balance, and the dream of doing what you love, is always the end goal! xo

  10. Yup. With you. Paddling furiously. I had a minor set back last week when my day job told me I couldn’t go part-time, as I had planned. I was banking on it to spend more time on my near full time photography business (and wedding planning and networking group running and and and) so I was seriously deflated last week, until I realised that full time day job = full time pay = I’m totally going to spend some of that money on a cleaner. Brilliant. I flippin’ hate cleaning. I may be frazzled from sitting up until 1am most mornings editing photos but my taps will be all sparkly. Every cloud. 😉 x

  11. Well, they do say that if you have something to be done, you should ask a busy person.

    The nature of my job means that I have huge amounts of time off. No matter how much I want to do with that time, the fact that I don’t have a busy routine to keep me on track means I lose the motivation to do anything.

    It’s all about balance (as is everything in life). I think this is one of the reasons why FF is so great, it is inspired by all the different experiences you have every day.

    I know that when I have spent the day with no plans, commitments or items on my ‘to do’ list, I find it very hard to add anything to the conversation over the dinner table. It’s a good job I don’t have my own blog!

    • Totally agree with that ‘ask a busy person’ thing – generally, if you’re running around like a lunatic and people STILL ask you to do things it means that you must do things well…well, that’s my reasoning, anyway!

  12. Another great post Rebecca! I definitely suffer slightly from FOMO and also don’t want to be seen as flaky! I am gradually learning that it’s better to be honest and say no to something when first invited rather than get stressed nearer the time when I realise how much else I have to fit in. My husband and I also have to compare diaries on a weekly basis just to try and make sure we have 1 evening together in the week! Sometimes it all works wonderfully and I feel like superwoman but more often than not I’m juggling like mad and I feel like I’m not giving any one thing 100%. but then I don’t want to miss out….hmmm….

  13. Just read this post and it completely rang true with me… that’s exactly how I’m feeling at the moment! At the moment outside of a 9-5 I’m juggling wedding planning (my own), moving out of London, sorting a job when I’m back home, securing temping whilst I’m still in London, blogging every day, starting up a new wedding blog, planning a hen weekend (someone else’s) and going to the gym to look half decent in a wedding dress :-/ All these things are exciting, so it’s hard to complain out loud… but man, I’m tired!
    Don’t suffer from FOMO so much anymore – definitely felt it more in my twenties (love the fact that I can say no far more easily and guilt-free now – mostly)… but I do feel that competitive, who is doing the best, who has the most exciting life on Facebook thing. Try not to compare myself, but hey, we’re girls. That’s what we do.
    When I feel it all become too much I make sure that I schedule a free Sat or Sun to either get all those admin/jobs done that are niggling at the back of my mind, or use it to just do nothing. And drink wine 😉

  14. Sometimes i feel like you read my mind! Had a meltdown on the weekend when it all came to a head how much i have on my plate what with the full time day job, blogging and now wedding planning on top of that. As well as keeping up with friends etc… Sometimes it just gets too much and I also feel like my blog suffers and I’m not giving it my all – then i feel guilty!

    Not sure of what the answer is but good to know others feel the same. Looking forward to the wedding planning coming to an end so I have a bit more free time and of course the honeymoon!!! xx

    • Sometimes a good ol’ ‘To Do’ list helps to make it all a bit more manageable, so you don’t get worried about forgetting anything… also it’s so satisfying to tick things off! (just me?!)

  15. I love your honesty, Rebecca… I don’t work fulltime at the moment, but this decision was dictated by the fact that when I was, and I was doing long hours in a very demanding environment, my health went downhill.
    I had to re-evaluate things and I realised that if my health was suffering and my husband was being relegated to second place (involuntarily), I’d to make big changes. Now that I work less hours, I’ve found 100s of other things to do, to the point that a month ago I felt that I was losing the balance again. I love blogging, I really do, and I would love it to be a career alongside the wedding planning, but at the moment I need to hold on to the only job that pays my bills.
    And if pushing myself to blog every day means that I spend little time with the one I love and that I’m up until 2am, gradually becoming ill because of lack of sleep, and that my other voluntary work suffers too, then I have to accept that I won’t be able to blog every day. I can’t compare myself to others. I can only do my best, but prioritising what/who matters the most in my life, now, is what makes me feel content.
    I keep going and gradually I’m making the changes that I can make without sacrificing the things I love the most in life. And because I’m determined, I’m sure one day I’ll get there too.
    xx Betta

  16. Late to the party as usual -cause why?? Cause week too busy to drink coffee and catch up with blogs!!!!! 😉 (seriously, haven’t managed to read AOW for weeks, makes me sad 🙁 ) Totally get it and totally get FOMO too -am at work til 8pm tonight and then driving 200 miles to attend a hen weekend…. all I want to do is lie on my sofa….. Sob.

  17. I currently have 413 unread blog posts in my reader. Including 13 unread posts for FF… ahh well. We can only do what we can do.

    I do love blogging but I know that if I committed to posting daily, it would stress me out and the precious little time I spend with my OH (we both work full time in demanding jobs) would suffer. It’s just not worth it.

    The older I get, the more my priorities change. And having a happy healthy relationship with my endlessly understanding partner and a happy healthy me are far more important than pretty much anything else… it doesn’t mean I’m not constantly juggling but sometimes I just have to give myself permission for a ball to drop. xxx

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