Category Archives: My Life

2013 in Review Part 1: Career and Family

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In January when I wrote my resolutions post, my fourth goal was a little bit cryptic. I wasn’t quite ready to talk about my plans and it has been a long journey since then, but now I’m finally ready to share and hopefully reassure or inspire some of you to go goal-getting. (You can read about my other resolutions and where I’m up to with them here.)

Here’s what I wrote back in January:
4. The big one… To embrace change and make choices. 2012 was an amazing year for me. Really amazing. In some more obvious ways nothing changed, in less tangible ways, everything did. This year is going to be the year of change I feel. Right now I don’t know what those changes are going to be … I know I will make career choices between paths that are polar opposites.

Back in January, everything was revolving around my work. I had been in a place I was happy (but still as a locum) for a long period, fought some personal demons about my career and work life, and felt ready to commit to full time General Practice. I had decided that this practice was the place I wanted to be long term and that’s no small matter when you are talking the rest of your working life.

What I didn’t know was whether they wanted me. I knew I was doing a great job and fitted in within the team, but in General Practice it’s not just about that. Different doctors bring different skills and you are often looking for a personality, a skill set or even a specific sex of doctor to complement the existing team, (and before any of you chip in about sexism, discrimination and employment law, it doesn’t apply here as I was looking to join as a self employed partner for which the rules are different.) I really wasn’t confident that I ticked all the boxes and the job I wanted was a desirable one, so I knew there would be plenty of potential interest from people who might fit the bill better. As I wrote in January I had decided to sit down, make my intentions clear and find out if there was a future for me there. I didn’t want to hear a negative response, but if there was no future for me there, I knew I had to go looking for it elsewhere.

When I did get a chance to talk to someone, the result was positive about me but very vague about any opportunity. I was gutted and spent about three weeks feeling pretty rubbish and wondering where to go next. I applied for a couple of jobs, felt positive about one and lacked any real enthusiasm for another. The first I didn’t get shortlisted for and the second I interviewed for, then narrowly missed out on the job. I was outraged(!) but relieved, the feeling I had about it had gotten worse and worse as I got more involved.

I decided to stay put, future or no future, it was where I wanted to be and as time went on I managed to muster a shred of optimism which I clung to, while I threw myself back into the job. By April a real solid opportunity had arisen and I hardly allowed myself to consider the possibility of a chance of getting what I wanted as I left to go on holiday, my future hanging in the balance.

You see it wasn’t just about the job. If there was no imminent job, there was nothing stopping Pete and I from thinking about starting a family. Before you guys jump in and say I shouldn’t be basing my decision on work, I felt ambivalent, like fate was due to play her hand. And so she did, as while we were away I was offered the job I wanted. Now I’m super excited to get stuck in, learn about the business side of GP and continue building my clinical experience. It feels like the start of a very rewarding journey.

So did any of you make career or family based decisions this New Year? I’d love to hear how you’re getting on or if my story has given you food for thought.

Love,
Rebecca
xo

PS The Reiss Sale Is Now Live!

2013 in review, Part 1: Home and Health

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Back in January, I wrote this post, on the obligatory New Years resolutions and invited you all to participate by getting your own down. As we are almost half way through the year, I thought it was a good time to check in and see how I’m getting on with my goals. As it’s not quite the second half of the year I thought it might be a good time to restart the clocks on things we were aspiring to back then. Perhaps some of them no longer seem important to you and you want to discard them in favour of new plans, maybe you have achieved your goals. Either way, please do chip in and here’s my no holds barred resolutions in review…

1. Swear less. Ahem, not much progress on that one. As expected!

2. Be more tidy. I’d like to have the mother of all clear outs and spring clean our entire house…

I’m not sure we have progressed much with tidiness, but the clear out is well and truly on! In just a few weeks, my sister is moving in with us while she looks for a house locally, as she is relocating to Manchester. Cue us being forced to make serious headway with the spare room. Currently, the room has a wardrobe, chest of drawers and another chest, all full of ‘stuff’. All of that needs a new home so she can properly move in and make herself comfortable as it’s likely to be 3-4 months or more that she is with us. I’ve already started on my wardrobe (the theory being that if I’m going to empty my second wardrobe, it needs somewhere to go!) and I’m using this post as my inspiration. On the plus side, it’s a great excuse to finish decorating in there and I’ll be sharing more on that particular project very soon.

3. Eat healthier. I’ve refrained from ‘exercise more’ here as I’ll be getting back to my usual BMF routine, but I do need to kick my dietary habits into touch and try to streamline. Being comfortable in your own skin is great but when your clothes tell you you are most certainly not comfortable, it’s time to make some changes!

I refrained in January from saying that I wanted to go on a diet but shortly after I wrote that post I started Weight Watchers again in ernest, planning to try and lose a few pounds. By the end of January I was 6lbs down and lighter than I had been for over 12 months. I felt great but I hadn’t committed to a long term change or improved my exercise habits and the never ending winter, plus a skiing holiday, then our trip to South Africa saw me gain it all back (and some) and then do precisely nothing about it. Now I’m at the stage where I have thoughts about wanting to lose weight every single day. I’ve totally fallen off the BMF band wagon, not least because I want to slim down rather than bulk up and exercise is not featuring heavily (if at all,) in my schedule.

For one reason and another I’ve found myself looking at a lot of old photographs recently, from the last 5 year period. I realised that around 1-2years ago, I already felt heavy, but when I compare those to more recent pictures, I’m really unhappy with the way I look. On the flippant side, I frequently have to double check that my arm actually belongs to me in photo’s because I can’t believe how chubby it is, but at the other end of the spectrum, I even feel myself less confident in front of Pete as I wonder what he thinks of my less toned self.

Thank goodness, the photo’s have been a great motivator, plus my bridesmaid duties looming at the end of July, a hen do to look forward to (and hopefully look good at!) and Jess’s example as she shapes up for the wedding too. I now have a diet and exercise buddy which makes everything easier, have lost a couple of pounds already and took the plunge by buying Jillian Micheal’s 30 day Shred video to really tone up in a concerted effort. I know some of you have done it so I’ll be posting a review soon and let you know how it goes!

So wish me luck ladies, and please do go back to this post to check on any your shared or repost your resolutions and progress over the last 5 months. Hopefully we can all work them out together!

Love,
Rebecca
xo

Image Credits: All prints by Daily Dishonesty available on Society6

Never go to sleep on an argument.

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Almost 2 weeks ago now it was Pete and I’s 4th wedding anniversary. When we got married, we asked everyone along with the guest book to write their ‘Advice for a happy marriage’ on little cards and envelopes that we collected in a huge apothecary jar. It was our intention to open them on our first wedding anniversary but we forgot and each time I came across them, or remembered them, it was far enough away from another anniversary that we forgot again. This year I stumbled across them more recently and kept them out purposely so we wouldn’t forget again this year.

And so it was that 4 years later we sat on the bed after dinner and took turns to open them and read the advice. Predictably, there were silly ones and funny ones amongst the lovely advice. I was surprised that we could guess who wrote what, even though most were unsigned and whilst we read them out, laughed and pondered, happy memories came flooding back. Like our polaroid photo guest book it was amazing the way you are transported back to that single day.

Just talk to each other and listen to what they have to say, simple.

Find space in your togetherness.

You are two parts of a whole, cherish each day together like it is your last.

Pick your battles!

Love, care and laugh. Don’t be too serious, but listen seriously.

Forgive one another before being asked.

The most dispensed piece of advice was a recurring theme and several of our guests wrote the same sentence…

Never go to sleep on an argument.

I’ll be honest, I’ve never really bought into that particular piece of advice and there have definitely been occasions when we haven’t followed it. Maybe I’m feeling sentimental but recently it struck me that it’s representative of everything that should be good about a marriage. Forgiveness, rising above day to day trials and trivial gripes because what’s important is that you’re together. Loving someone and making sure they know it every day; that they can go asleep secure in that knowledge every night. Putting your relationship first.  Facing problems and life together as a team.


Image Credit: Raw Photography

I know whenever we have gone to sleep on an argument, I’ve always woken feeling sheepish, the disagreement long forgotten. The reasons I had for feeling angry or exasperated always feel trivial and not worthy of the time spent back turned and without the other for comfort.

So I wondered did you do anything similar at your wedding? Have you ever been given advice for your marriage and like me, has your opinion changed as your relationship grows older? Have you got any advice to share here that you have learned from experience?

Love,
Rebecca
xo

PS It’s been a while since I’ve written a personal post – but I’m hoping to write more in the coming months and hope you’ll all join in and add your thoughts in the comments.

Past personal posts…

Hen Heaven

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*First of all, Jess, if you are reading this, avert your eyes!

In just 7 weeks, I am hosting the hen do for Jess, my best friend, ahead of her end of August wedding. After the incredible hen do she planned for me, along with my other bridesmaids Laura and my sister, I’m feeling the pressure a little bit and also super excited.

The location is set (and shall remain a secret,) accommodation booked and a variety of activities lined up. Now all that remains to plan are the obligatory hen games every hen should be subjected to. I know they’re cliched and cheesy, but they’re also a great way for a group of ladies who don’t necessarily know each other to break the ice and possibly find out more than they ever wanted to know about each other. ;)

I remember one such game at my hen do where each lady was given a banana, a piece of string and a balloon. (You can see where this is going…) The banana’s were suspended by the string around each participants waist and the object of the game was for them to get themselves and their balloon from the one side of the room to the other using only their banana – hands were tied behind their backs. Cue much laughter, admiration over other competitors ‘bananas’ and a whole lot of thrusting hilarity. I should add this all took place thankfully in the privacy of the rented house we stayed in!

I can’t think of a better place then here to find some new ideas for hen party games to break the ice with – from your own hen party, or perhaps one you organised or attended. I’d be so grateful if you could leave me a comment with some suggestions of games you and the hen have enjoyed over the years and so I can steal them come July!

Thanks in advance readers – you’re all superstars :)

Love,
Rebecca
xo

*Image above from Bridesmaids the movie – possibly one of the funniest films I have ever seen. Have you seen it? Did you like it?

My Month: April

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This month is a tale of two halves. As you read this I’m travelling back from 2 weeks in South Africa, (remember when I started planning back in January?) I have so much to share from the trip but for now will whet your appetite with a few Instagram snaps. The first half of the month follows, with my usual and far less interesting exploits ;)

As always, the links in the list go back to posts I have written that correspond to the snaps (if you want to catch up,) and you can follow me throughout the month on Instagram @rebecca_norris on your phone, online or there’s a feed on the right hand side bar here on Florence Finds :)

  • My Travel Outfit for the plane: spots and stripes, layers and flats.
  • Cocktails on the roof of The Grand Daddy Hotel, amongst Airstream caravans
  • A long way from anywhere, at the Cape of Good Hope
  • A rainy day outfit for walking and sightseeing on the Atlantic peninsula.
  • The view from our Camps Bay Hotel
  • African Pengins at Boulders beach
  • Just one selection of amazing seafood we enjoyed.
  • Table Mountain, from the ferry to Robben Island
  • My very apt lion birthday card (from Paperchase) from Pete :)
  • Birthday outfit
  • The view from Table Mountain
  • Camps Bay beach
  • One of our hotels on route to The Eastern Cape
  • Meeting the Cheetah’s at Tenikwa – a trip highlight.

  • Making macarons with my sister and enjoying nights out over Easter, with Francesca again.
  • Re-wearing my Whistles Wisteria print dress for a (cold) early April wedding with tights and sparkly shoes (see it worn here and here also)
  • Mixing animal prints in my new favourite outfit – worn for the Style Me Vintage Weddings book launch in London.
  • Animal print points with my blue lace skirt (and Pete getting in on the footwear action!)
  • The Style Me Vintage Weddings launch
  • Breakfast in Hoxton
  • New reading material, courtesy of Gemma, pre-holiday.
  • Purchases from & Other Stories
  • Trying out my new boots and my go-anywhere dress for dinner one night.
  • New art (that I bought pete for his birthday) framed and ready to hang, starting off our new gallery wall.
  • Outfits of the day, trying to bring colour into cold days.

How was your April readers? Are you looking forward to May with all it’s bank holidays and the promise of warmer weather?

Love,
Rebecca
xo

First Time Mum: The Early Days

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Today, Becky is back with another update on her journey as a new Mum. When Becky first sent me this post she told me she had left a few paragraphs out as she didn’t want to scare any mums-to-be with the changes inevitably ahead. I asked her to send me them and we eventually agreed to include them here. Thankfully, these days the challenges of motherhood are more openly discussed along with the inherent joys and so I dont think some of the feelings Becky experienced will come as a shock to many, but if you are expecting and feel like today is not the day for a dose of reality, then feel free to skip down to her tips for getting thorough the first few weeks – about halfway down the page.

During the first few hazy days of motherhood, most people tell you that the first 2 weeks are the hardest but to enjoy every minute of it. I found it difficult to understand at the time but now, on the other side of the first three months, I totally get it. I think Mother Nature’s memory loss trick has a lot to answer for, but as I fought back the tears whilst packing Connie’s newborn clothes away recently, I realised that they are tiny for the shortest snippet of time. Blink and you’ve missed it.

Being a new mum is amazing in so many ways, but it’s also a time when you feel an enormous pressure to feel completely over the moon with life. I know that not everyone feels like that as not only is it really tough physically and emotionally, I think many new mums, me included, can feel completely overwhelmed by the responsibility of getting it right. No matter how many times you tell yourself that your life is going to change forever while you’re pregnant, the actual reality of it in the early days is mind blowing. All of a sudden you realise you are never going to be the person you were ever again. There were moments when I felt as if I was mourning the loss of my previous self but also feeling guilty for thinking it at the same time as Connie was everything I’d asked for. This was a post that I read, on Renegade Mothering, that I really identified with.

Most importantly, you must trust your instinct. Even in the first few days of motherhood when you think you haven’t a clue about the best way to care for your baby, just believe in yourself. You will know your baby better than any midwife or health visitor. You will be given ‘helpful’ advice from everyone you speak to. Most of it will be conflicting and everyone will suddenly have an opinion. I’d suggest quietly taking on board what they say and then doing things the way that you feel suits you and your baby. I was given some terrible advice by a health visitor and breastfeeding counsellor when I sought support in the early days. I knew deep down that it wasn’t the right advice for Connie and I but I didn’t have the confidence to believe that I knew better. As a result, I followed their advice and fell to pieces for a week. Thankfully my Mum was able to come to my rescue and we got back on track doing things the way we’d been doing them from the start. It was a tough lesson in self belief.

For today’s post, I wanted to share some of the things that helped us through those tough early days and hopefully, they might make it all seem a little more manageable.

EATING
During the later stages of pregnancy, start cooking in batches to stock your freezer with home cooked meals that are easy to re-heat. This is the most useful thing I did on my maternity leave.

SLEEPING
Sleep when your baby sleeps – even if you have a house full of visitors. Newborns don’t know night from day and need to feed every couple of hours.

It’s common for babies to go on feeding frenzies at night time (called cluster feeding). Connie regularly fed until 4.30am. After the first few nights, I was starting to struggle as I’d been staying up with her watching TV, reading or online. On day 6, a midwife suggested I try to keep night as restful as possible even if I wasn’t sleeping and she showed me how to safely feed in bed. This was the best piece of advice I was given. It saved me from becoming nocturnal and eventually, your baby will start to recognise the difference between the bright, noisy day, and dark hushed night.

For settling your baby, I cannot recommend this advice enough. We also used a hot water bottle to warm the moses basket before placing Connie into it. White noise is also your best friend. There are white noise apps available which we used regularly, along with the hairdryer!

Make sure you’re clued up on Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS). You’ll find everything you need to know on The Lullaby Trust website

The long nights can get very lonely and overwhelming. Remember that everything seems better in the daylight.

SUPPORT
If you’ve attended any ante natal groups and classes and have met new mums to be, try and suggest setting up a Facebook group so you can all keep in touch. It’s invaluable to have an instant support network of people who are going through almost exactly the same thing. I regularly posted questions in the middle of the night and got a response within minutes.

Ask your visitors to run errands, help with housework, bring meals etc. Play to their strengths and you should have all bases covered.

And finally, a few things I was grateful for…
Comfy loungewear – treat yourself to some nice pyjamas and a dressing gown for home rather than the hospital – something you don’t mind visitors seeing you in.

A baby swing/ bouncy chair to give you 5 minutes in the shower when your partner has returned to work.

A minimal make up bag and speedy way to style your hair.

A repertoire of songs you can sing to your baby – 10 green bottles is always a good starting point.

So readers, do you have any advice to share that got you through those newborn days?

Love,
Becky
x

PS Some of Becky’s previous posts:

Monday Must Have: StyleUp Daily

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When it comes to styling myself, I draw a lot of inspiration from the blogs that I read; some fashion and some lifestyle orientated. That’s what motivates me to share my own outfits, because I enjoy seeing other peoples. I tend to read a specific style of blog though which doesn’t leave me with much variation in the fashion inspiration I’m seeing. I also find it limiting when people have a strong personal sense of style, as I may love their outfits most of the time but I don’t want to look like an identikit copy nor do I own their wardrobe! If only there was someone to trawl the internet looking for outfit inspiration for me. Well it turns out there is!

A while ago I found StyleUp via an interview with its founder, Kendall Herbst. I clicked through and discovered what the site was all about. Sign up, and Monday to Friday you receive a shot of outfit inspiration (in the form of a street style snap of bloggers, celebrities and normal people wearing a great outfit) to give you ideas for what to wear that day. Each outfit is chosen to suit the weather in your location, so no breezy LA outfits to frustrate me in rainy Manchester! The idea is that it encourages you to think again about what you have in your wardrobe already and reinterpret according to current trends.

It’s a clever idea and I can’t imagine the work that must have gone into creating it. When you sign up the site asks you a couple of short questions about how you describe your style and gives you some outfit pairs to choose between, then the info you have given helps them decide which inspiration shot you receive each day. Your personal settings are further honed as you use the service, as you can feedback each day on whether you like the outfit or not, which in turn influences your emails in future.

The site extends to a community which I haven’t tapped into yet where your comments on your daily StyleUp‘s go and other users can agree or not, plus you can upload your own outfits for opinions.

I’m loving it, hence me sharing here. So far 70-80% of the images I have been sent have been a hit and whilst I don’t use it to get dressed in the morning, the inspiration stays with me when I’m outfit planning for a getaway, event or just the weekend.

Give it a go guys – I think you’ll love it!

Love,
Rebecca
xo

Colour Covet: Pastel Pretties

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Right now, I am all about Pastel and it’s particularly seasonally appropriate with Easter coming up… always a pastel pretty affair. Fortunately so many of my favourite things are currently being released in a pastel edition and I’ve rounded up pastels for every aspect of your life today.

 
Are you embracing pastels this spring?

Love,
Rebecca
xo

Spotted: Style Me Vintage Weddings

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I have been excited about writing today’s post for what feels like months and this weekend I finally got my hands on a copy of Style Me Vintage: Weddings. I don’t normally write about weddings these days, but this wasn’t hard to make an exception for as it was written by my friend and fellow blogger, Annabel Beeforth of Love My Dress, a wedding blog with ‘a focus on vintage, retro, glamorous, chic and elegant content.’

Way back when I was a wedding blogger (at Rock My Wedding,) I had 2 big goals. 1. I wanted to be featured in Grazia magazine (just because it was my favourite magazine,) and 2. I wanted to write a book. I’ve always taken great pleasure in blogging as an industry and being a part of it as it advances and develops, particularly in the UK, so although it wasn’t me who eventually wrote that book, it gives me no end of pleasure that it’s my friend Annabel who takes that prize and deservedly so.

Annabel is one of the hardest working wedding bloggers out there. Anybody who thinks full time professional blogging is a cushy job really doesn’t know enough about what’s involved. Sure there are perks and glitzy industry events, but nine times out of ten you arrive knackered after the usual slog of prepping blog posts and the part of the job that really takes over, the administration behind the scenes of answering emails and actually running a blog as a business. To add writing a book to that is a massive workload so my hat really goes off to Annabel for pulling it off.

The book, as the title suggests, focuses on vintage wedding style, breaking it down by decade and this is where Annabel really shows off the incredible knowledge she has developed as an expert in vintage style. There are real vintage style weddings and inspirational styled images. Each chapter also has sections on perfecting every aspect of your look for an authentic take on vintage inspired, with beauty, fashion, stationery and decor touches to complete the look.

And what a job Annabel has done. I love a good coffee table book – for me they have to be beautiful to hold and beautifully illustrated. Annabel ensured that when she enlisted Joanna Brown who has captured the images which really are of the highest quality and completely breathtaking in places. Special mention goes to Michelle Kelly, (my colleague at Dream Find Do,) and founder of Pocketful of Dreams, who styled the images to ‘create distinct decor elements that would bring each era to life’ with her impeccable eye and managed to make vintage very very modern. Zoe Lem takes credit for the fashion picks and styling.

For me the triumph of this book is in its genuine display of knowledge, collection of real historical references and then the incredibly thoughtful respresentation of those eras presented in the inspiration images.

You can find Style Me Vintage: Weddings on Amazon – if you need to buy a gift for a bride to be that you know, if she likes vintage style then I guarantee she’ll love it. :)

Well Done Annabel!

Love,
Rebecca
xo

The Big Spring List…

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Last autumn, I created a list of thing I wanted to do in the coming months and I think it helped me embrace the season and make the most of all the joy it brings, so I decided to make it a bi-annual event and write a spring list too.

I think everybody loves spring. It’s a close call which season is my favourite if I’m honest but as winter is definitely my least favourite there’s something joyous about emerging into longer days, spring sunshine, bright colours and lighter food. Join in by making your list in the comments section below and just for fun go back and see if you managed any of your planned Autumn escapades.

Here’s a list of the things I’ll be trying to squeeze in this spring…

  1. Take a trip to the seaside and walk in the wind on the beach.
  2. Go daffodil spotting on a long walk.
  3. Eat spring lamb in a gastro pub somewhere pretty.
  4. Celebrate Easter with chocolate recipes and mini-eggs.
  5. Get back to regular exercise as the nights get lighter and start running again.
  6. Tidy up and re-arrange the back garden to make it ready for al fresco dining.
  7. Start growing seeds for the allotment.
  8. Take a trip to London to catch up with blog buddies and friends.
  9. Remember what the sun feels like on my skin.
  10. Plan a weekend away for one of the May bank holiday weekends.

Now it’s your turn…

Love,
Rebecca
xo