2 months with Bea

Wow. Where did the last 8 weeks go? Seeing your little baby grow is simultaneously thrilling and terrifying – time is going so fast!

So much has changed already in the last month. Last time I updated you all Bea was a tiny newborn, all snoozy and helpless. In the last month she has grown feisty and smiley and like a tiny best friend I always have around. 🙂

I was recommended The Wonder Weeks App just after Bea was born and was a bit sceptical – it talks about babies all having developmental ‘leaps’ (where they learn how to do something new,) at certain ages. The night before Bea was 5 weeks she was way fussier than usual and fed more, in a really out of character way and I was clueless as to the cause. Then the next morning she woke up and smiled at me! It was the best thing ever and now Pete says he will do absolutely anything to make her smile. (I also bought the book but admit I haven’t had much chance to read it! – The Wonder Weeks. ) The smiles were a bit hit and miss at first but from 6 weeks we reliably get them every day, always best in the morning.

That 6 week mark was a real turning point for us. After the smiles started we noticed Bea seems so much more alert and awake. Now it’s like she sees us when she looks at us and she looks for my voice and smiles when she hears it. She’s so much more sturdy now and looks around all the time at things when we’re out and about. Her sleep patterns are changing too, with longer and longer stretches at night, we’re now onto one ‘night’ feed between 3 and 5am then another morning feed between 6 and 9am which is pretty great. Those long ‘wake’ periods she had in the night have also settled thankfully.

At 7 weeks we had to go for her first injection – in Manchester all babies get a BCG (TB vaccination) as newborns and I was surprisingly (to myself at least) nervous about it. The thought of my little baby being hurt was awful and she did cry, but it was over in a second and she settled straight away. I managed not to cry, but it was a close call!

At just 8 weeks now she seems so big (although she is still wearing all newborn or 0-1 month clothes.) She is so much more vocal about what she does and doesn’t like now – often whinging a bit when she needs a cuddle to get off to sleep. Her sleeping has got better and better and we have had 2 nights where she has slept straight through but to be honest I prefer when she doesn’t, as a ‘full night’ means she wakes at 7 after a late 11ish feed and I get less sleep in total that way. The first time gave me the fright of my life though when the alarm went off and I realised she hadn’t woken me at all! I’m also seeing daytime patterns emerge with 2 sleeps in the morning and 2 in the afternoon before what I call ‘the witching hour’ starts and the evening cluster feeding begins.

The other big change this month has been her interaction with Pete and I. Since Pete went back to work there is a definite difference in the way she responds to both of us and when she is tired or fussy it’s me she wants and settles better with. I feel in equal measure disappointed and delighted by this – after all it’s selfishly so lovely to be her favourite person, but I always wanted Pete to be a completely equal partner in parenting and interchangeable with me. I suppose that was naive looking back as with maternity leave and breast feeding I was bound to have the upper hand at this stage and I hope in the future she will love spending time with Daddy just as much. For now though, when Pete is home, he’s left ‘holding the baby’ – it means I end up cooking often or doing housework instead but its worth it for him to have quality time with Bea and work on his quota of smiles. 😉

In some ways it has also been a month of adjustment. Although I have no desire to do anything else right now, it has been a big mental shift towards becoming a ‘Mum’. Now I’m at home I feel under pressure (although not from Pete, only myself,) to keep the house in order too, doing housework and preparing meals or shopping. I have at times felt insignificant in the world knowing I have so little impact in a wider sense as Bea and I go about our daily business together, despite my belief that mothering itself is an unmeasurable contribution to society as a whole. It has been a passing thought though and I’m finally getting into my groove of balancing all the different aspects of this new stay-at-home life.

I hope you have enjoyed the update and perhaps some of you can identify with my thoughts?

Love,
Rebecca
xo

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12 thoughts on “2 months with Bea

  1. Rebecca she is gorgeous! What a cutie. I remember when Richard went back to work after a month of gardening leave (which happily coincided with when Calum was born), I was left feeling “oh my goodness, what am I going to do now?”. After 11 years of being in the workplace and only two weeks at home before he was born (which to be honest felt like holiday) I was left feeling a bit at sea with all my new found time at home. First, I probably stretched myself too much and signed up for too many classes with him – sometimes two in day – which I know now was WAY too much – for both him and me. I don’t mind saying that I found the transition into doing not much at home from being so busy with a busy job, quite difficult. But as with all these things, you soon get used to it. I did crave Richard’s arrival at home for the first few months though, just so the load could be shared a bit, and I also re-found my love for baking (which didn’t help the shifting the baby weight cause). I was only off work for 6 months though and they went by in a flash. I’d certainly do that differently if there was ever a next time x

  2. She is very cute. My baby girl, Alice, is 5 weeks today. She is my second baby. My other daughter, Iona, will be 3 years old on Tuesday. It’s been quite different second time round. I thought breastfeeding would be easy since I’ve done it before. I didn’t expect Alice to have tongue tie and the first weeks have been obsessing over feeding and weight gain. Pleased to say things are improving though. It’s also been difficult trying to keep my 3 year old in a routine and keep her entertained. She wakes up in the morning full of energy after 12 hours of sleep whereas I’m ready to crash out on the couch. I’m starting to get to grips with things though and it’s amazing what you can get done during nap times. I don’t plan on having more children so I really want to enjoy this time I have and try to take it all in and make the most of it.

  3. Bea is so cute, she looks really like you in the 7 week photo! Good work on the sleeping as well. The being at home aspect of being a mum was nothing like I expected, I’d had plans of learning French whilst the baby napped (ha!) and for me achieving hardly anything tangible each day took a long while to get used to. Getting used to the fact that at the moment your “job” is making sure your baby is fed, clean and happy each day is such a strange concept you are used to life going at a million miles an hour!

  4. Glad your still enjoying,it…isn’t being a mum the best thing ever! I’m amazed how much Dexter has changed and how far he has come along. But yes I agree it’s like having a best frend with you all the time.
    Long may it last! xx

  5. She is just beautiful!
    I really know what you mean about that wrench when Dad goes back to work and the worry your little one will lose some closeness to them. Little M is eighteen months now and I can confirm that it doesn’t always follow as she was exactly the same as Bea and now is a total Daddy’s girl – he can make her laugh like no-one else and she is always looking for him. However I will say that it’s still me she comes to if she has a little bump 🙂

  6. Three weeks old today and I can identify with so much if what you’ve said. The rest of it brings me hope! I don’t want to wish my baby’s life away, but I can’t wait for smiles and sleep : )

  7. Super cute! Such a lovely thing to have these posts to look back on in the future. I wish I’d done more than take millions of photos on my phone to document E growing up as it does go so quickly and she’s pushing two without me even realising. And as Lexi said, I am very much comfort and reassurance now, daddy is the fun one who gets the best smiles so enjoy being number one for a bit.

  8. That transition from working woman to stay at home mum is hard, never mind all the sleep deprivation and baby care duties. It sounds like you are coping amazingly, and Bea looks very well on it :). It’s funny, I just received a text from my friend who has a 5 week old, to thank me for giving her my copy of the Wonder Weeks, as it is helping to explain the crazy behaviour before a ‘leap’! It is the only book I have passed on, and the only one I would recommend (the others were a bit too dictatorial, in the manner of “Your baby should be having x number of sleeps/poos/feeds,” which mine rarely were :)). xxx

  9. ps. re. Wonder Weeks. Had the app and found it invaluable. Although it doesn’t go up to my daughter’s age the signs are still exactly the same for developmental leaps and it’s so helpful to be able to assign challenging behaviour to something so positive.

  10. She’s such a gorgeous little one, your Bea. I’m currently pregnant with my first, so can’t really comment on what life is like with a baby, but coming from a similar background (also a medic) I’m really interested in the thoughts in your last paragraph. There’s a really interesting book by psychotherapist Naomi Stadlen called “What Mothers Do: especially when it looks like nothing” which explores this issue in a really interesting and thoughtful way. Though I guess I’m biased to think so as I’m a psychiatrist & psychotherapist myself! 😉 She also holds drop in sessions weekly at the Active Birth Centre in London, which I think are aimed at helping women explore similar sorts of issues. Anyway, all that to say I don’t think you’re at all alone in those experiences!

    Also, just a thank you for blogging as you do. Your blog is a useful resource for those of us following along behind you.

    • Welome to FF ellebougies. Thank you for your lovely comment – I’ve actually just read What Mothers Do and will be reviewing it soon.

      Congratulations and good luck with the rest of your pregnancy 🙂

      x

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